Well, tomorrow is my solemn profession in the Community of Solitude. I will make my life vows as a Benedictine, vows of Conversion of Life, Stability in my life of prayer, and Obedience.
This week has been crazy, with exams for the IGC on Monday, training two days, IGC practical exam this morning, and trying to fit a week's work into my one office day. In and around all of that, I have been very aware of my profession ceremony: finalising the liturgy, organising readers and organists, having final fittings for my cuculla (the big black "cloak" that a solemnly professed Benedictine wears in prayer and "in choir"), getting vows ready for signing tomorrow and so on. So many little things to organise.
But bigger than all of the small details is the knowledge that tomorrow I will finally make public vows to God that supersede the ones I made in 2003 as a Franciscan, vows for life. I will publicly declare the promises that I made privately to God at the age of 15, one sunny Sunday morning in the garden centre where I worked.
And I am so glad. I am finally feeling ready to do this. The cool breeze is coming through the front door after the heat of the day, and there is peace on it, peace in my heart, the knowledge that this is the right thing for me, here, now, in this place, in this Community. Deo gratias.